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Holiday Gatherings

Holidays are reknowned as the time for family and old friends to get together and celebrate the accomplishments of the past year and give hope and best wishes for the new. Often, however, holidays are the time for family and old friends to get together to renew and expand the fights and arguments, which they did not resolve last year.

Let us make this holiday season a time to change the negative dynamic, if such is the situation in your gatherings.

Where did we get the idea that we, our family, and our friends were supposed to be perfect? If we were, we wouldn't be here. We are here because the purpose in being here is to learn the lessons - and the first lesson in our growth to becoming all that we can be is to love and accept ourselves, our family and our friends exactly as we are, and develop appreciation.

Behavior toward and within a group can change, as our attitudes change. Think and beave positively to the gathering and watch this year's holidays become the best ever. It is the same principle to use when we want children to behave in appropriate ways. What you stroke, is what you get. In other words, what you pay attention to expands. A child who misbehaves and gets attention will continue to misbehave. A similar reaction occurs with everyone because as we are criticised we become frightened. The more afraid we are, the more we do the very things for which we are criticised. This is called a 'self-fulfilling prophecy' or the 'Pygmalion Effect.'

As with everything, change begins with yourself. Examine how you perceived a certain situation and how you can chose to change your perception. Remember that the thoughts we think create the feelings, and it is our perception that creates our interpretations of the situation. Remember that everybody is doing the best they can with what they know, and that includes you.

Be especially grateful to your friends and family and appreciate the lessons that have contributed to your growth and made you who you are now.

Any questions??